Break The Cycle of Failure

Break the cycle of failure by doing something extraordinary. Thomas A Edison kept going when he was working on inventing the light bulb. He could have given up and where would that leave us today? Fortunately, he kept finding ways that did not work, did not produce the result he wanted. With every failure, he knew he was one step closer to finding the solution.

"All my successes have been built on my failures."- Benjamin Disraeli

So maybe you tried something which did not work. Maybe you called some people and they said no. Some people or lots of people? Maybe you wrote a book and a couple of publishers said no. Do you know how many publishers turned down JK Rowling's first Harry Potter book? Twelve, before the chairman's daughter at Bloomsbury demanded to see the next chapter. "Jonathan Livingston Seagull" was first turned down by 18 publishers.

Are you going to allow other people to steal your dream, to prevent you from achieving whatever it is that burns inside you? Are you going to live a future which is far short of the life that you know is waiting for you? Have you seen that life, felt it, heard it, tasted it, smelt it?

You have probably heard about the power of visualization. Well it is true. "Whatever the mind can conceive, the mind can achieve." Why? Simply because the unconscious mind knows no difference between reality and fiction. It creates whatever you think about. As a hypnotherapist, I know how feeding positive suggestions with visualization direct to the unconscious mind can bring desired results. So if you think about people rejecting your idea, your project, your service then you will project that thought on to others and it will be your reality. But imagine yourself achieving, succeeding. Make that visualization strong and that thought will gather strength and go out into the universe. Don't be concerned with how it will be achieved. Just be ready for the positive result, the YES.

"There is no failure except in no longer trying." - Elbert Hubbard

I encourage you to be a grown-up, not a given-up.

"Between you and every goal that you wish to achieve, there is a series of obstacles, and the bigger the goal, the bigger the obstacles. Your decision to be, have and do something out of the ordinary entails facing difficulties and challenges that are out of the ordinary as well. Sometimes your greatest asset is simply your ability to stay with it longer than anyone else."

- Brian Tracy

Here is the bad news. When you set out to achieve anything out of the ordinary, you will encounter obstacles, set-backs, negativity and the most damaging is negative self-talk. The challenge lies within you to overcome them and keep your mind focussed on the result with the absolute certainty that it is out there, waiting for you. It is not a question of if but when.

Be absolutely sure why you want to achieve this future? Ensure that the reasons are worthy of you, your family and the global community. Write down your reasons, why you not only want to achieve but why you must achieve.

Start by being grateful for where you are, for having a skill that you can share. You might need to develop the skill, take courses to fine-tune it, deepen your knowledge or maybe you just need practice. Learn from others whom you admire or who are already achieving success in your chosen field.

The question then is, are you ready for success? Are you ready to receive? Are you ready to turn your desire into day-to-day reality? Let me know when you start your book signing tour.

©Antonia Harrison 2009 from Personal Development in the 21st Century

Until the Uncomfortable Becomes Your New Comfort Zone

How many times have you heard someone say "I can't do that because I've always done...(something else)". Think of the generations of mineworkers who stubbornly saw no other option when the mines closed.

Sometimes others tell us we cannot do something because we have no previous experience in that field. They laugh at our dreams and try to hold us back. They say it is for our own good to avoid disappointment.

Fred Luster was a steelworker who was laid off. He had always had a knack for cutting hair so he became a barber. He moved into the entire field of personal grooming. From there he built Luster Products, a multimillion-dollar corporation.

What is stopping you from overcoming the unlikely, the impossible? Do you believe that you are not good enough, not clever enough, not able enough or are you just listening to the negative self-talk which is holding you back in your uncomfortable comfort zone?

There will always be obstacles, trials sent to test us eg a failed relationship, illness, financial problems, lack of support but from these we learn more to make us stronger, better equipped for the future. Are you going to allow these temporary setbacks to stop you achieving your potential? Even though you have been hurt before, it is the only way to grow. We all have the capacity to change, to lead meaninful and productive lives by awakening our consciousness. Consciousness is our energy force comprised of our thoughts, feelings and impressions from the outside world.

Find the reasons why you must grow, why you must make the change, why you must achieve. When you go inside and find those reasons, you become stronger.

When you decide that it is time to grow, be prepared for a bumpy ride until the uncomfortable becomes your new level of comfort zone.

©Antonia Harrison 2009 from Personal Development in the 21st Century

Why Do People Self-sabotage Their Lives?

Why do people self-sabotage their lives?

Why do some people with every apparent disadvantage make something of their lives – look at Oprah Winfrey’s life journey - while others with advantages throw it all away, on drink, drugs, poor life choices, destroying relationships with those who love them most?

A student wins a scholarship to a prestigious college but fails to turn in two assignments on time and is asked to leave.

Someone with great musical talent stops practicing, two weeks before an important selection.

On the first day of starting a great new job, a person forgets to set their alarm clock so arrives late creating a poor first impression.

Or the person who says they want a better job but deliberately applies for unsuitable jobs, one they are not qualified for or are not practically possible.

Another person has been told by their doctor that they must lose weight and improve their eating habits drastically to avoid serious illness, possibly death. Full of good intention, they start a sensible eating programme and join a fitness class but stop after just two weeks. The pain of making the change is somehow greater than the pain of the threat of illness.

The person who ignores on-going pain, swallowing pain-killers, refusing to see a doctor then discovering one day they have terminal cancer which could have been cured had they sought help earlier.

A person finally receives the keys to a dream home but neglects to pay the home insurance and the downstairs is destroyed by an electrical fault.

The father who has a loving wife, good children and a happy home but destroys everyone’s happiness by starting an affair.

The person who wants love, wants a togetherness relationship, but when it stares them in the face, runs a mile, too scared to give back and make a commitment. It is easier to find some small reason why they cannot enjoy happiness together instead of choosing to overcome any issues. No relationship is perfect but they go looking for something which does not exist instead of appreciating how fortunate they are to have found someone who loves them.

They say we have a fear of failure but too often, the real problem is fear of success.

What if we really could have it all? Other people do and not just in movies.

Does it come from a deep-rooted feeling of not being good enough, not deserving enough, not capable enough of living up to what will be required of us if we do step into this next stage – even if it means fulfilling our dreams? Why not eliminate that negative comparison “not ….. enough” once and for all? According to who?

Self-sabotage behaviour is when there is no logical or rational explanation for why you cannot do the things you want to do or why you cannot have the things you want to have.

Sometimes it is so frightening to imagine changing, growing or making conscious choices that we deliberately hamper our own efforts. That means that something is going on unconsciously to cause us to self-sabotage.

Self-sabotage is really a form of self-hatred. It is not extreme to say that. There is a fine line between love and hate and if you are self-sabotaging, you have not learned to truly love yourself.

Are you going to allow the negative self-talk to keep you on a path of destruction or are you going to build a better future, brick by brick?

"Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude." - W.W. Ziege

I think we all have situations where parts of us are not in congruence ie part of us says/wants one thing while another part of says/wants something else. This inner dichotomy can cause a great deal of stress if not resolved. NLP has a very effective technique for dealing with this “inner tug-of-war” by integrating the parts when a person is ready.

In which areas of life are you holding yourself back? Do you know why? Is procrastination your enemy? Laziness? Is it fear of success? Fear of commitment? Are you waiting for the perfect scenario? (The UK government did that with the Euro. Now the Pound has fallen from 1.40 € to 1.22 €.)

I suggest you find some quiet time to be with your inner self. Ask yourself what you are afraid of. What fears do you have? What uncertainties? What makes you feel uncomfortable about this goal? For what reasons would you try to hold yourself back? Using a journal to write down questions and answers can help too because writing helps you to connect with the deepest part of yourself. It might take time and practice, but exploring these possibilities can dramatically help you to flee the self-sabotage rut.

Hypnosis sessions can quickly deal with overcoming limiting beliefs, fears and destructive behavior.

Be authentic and true to yourself. You can be, do or have anything you want but first you may need to clear some of the negative obstructions which are holding you back. You can be free to live the life you truly want.

“If you want to make your dreams come true, the first thing you have to do is wake up.” - J. M. Power

“By your thoughts you are daily, even hourly, building your life; you are carving your destiny.” - Ruth Barrick Golden

“Your life changes the moment you make a new, congruent, and committed decision.” - Anthony Robbins

"Procrastination . . . is the thief of our self-respect. It nags us and spoils our fun. It deprives us of the fullest realization of our ambitions and hopes." - Thomas S. Monson

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." – Mark Twain

"Excuses are the words coming from the loser in you." - Robert Kiyosaki in Rich Dad Poor Dad

"Nothing is more expensive than a missed opportunity." - H. Jackson Brown JR.

" Always be able to look back and say “ At Least I did notlLead no Humdrum Life” - Forrest Gump

© Antonia Harrison the English Hypnotherapist & NLP Practitioner in Belgium and Download Hypnosis Mp3 for immediate, affordable hypnosis Mp3s to improve your life.

Talk to Yourself

How much time do you spend talking to yourself in a positive, caring and supportive way and how much time in a destructive, negative way?

Did you know that on average as much as 94 percent of your inner dialogue tends to be about your problems - the things you fear, your worries, the people you're angry at and other concerns?

I recently came upon this statistic and it surprised and upset me. It upset me because I believe that what we think about and focus on most of the time is what we attract into our lives. No wonder so many people are still dreaming about their ideal life rather than living it!

The more I thought about this the more I realized that I should not really be surprised since I come across this situation constantly when working with people. In fact, from my experience, replacing negative self-talk with a supportive and positive one is the first and most important step towards achieving your goals and dreams.

ACTION:
1. First, become aware of how you talk to yourself by putting a rubber band around your wrist. Every time you catch yourself being negative (saying things such as, “What is wrong with me?” “I am such an idiot”, “I am not smart enough”; “I am too old for this now”; “I am so fat and ugly”… you get the idea) pull the rubber band and snap your wrist. This is an excellent conditioning technique that works wonders when it comes to awareness and elimination of negative self-talk!

2. Once you become aware of the negative things you say to yourself, replace them with positive and supportive words. Be loving and kind to yourself and consciously keep your inner dialogue consistent with what you wish to accomplish.

3. Use affirmations to help you program yourself to be positive. Here are some good examples:

I like myself!
I can do it!
I am the best!
Come up with your own as well and repeat them often, especially when feeling insecure or when struggling with making a decision.

Source: Masha Malka


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